An Open Letter By Susan McLean

Dear lady behind me on the train,

I’m sure you’re a nice person but I would really appreciate if you could remove your feet from my armrest. I would like to use my armrest and I wouldn’t even mind as much if your feet were anywhere near clean. Clearly, from their odor, they are not. I also suggest you see a doctor about that toenail thing....

Also, please consider investing in headphones. It would make your listening experience much more pleasurable and my not-strangling-you experience much easier.

Finally, I am 40-65% sure you have restless leg syndrome.

Love, Susan